DECONSTRUCTING A TRIPLE TRAGEDY: KC’s Javon
Belcher Mystery
Tuesday, December 04, 2012
By Rev. Dr. Larry Delano Coleman
The
murder-suicide of Kansas City Chiefs linebacker, Javon Belcher, has left more
questions than answers. Its motive remains a mystery, dying with Kassandra
Perkins, Belcher’s 22-year old, live-in girlfriend, and with 25-year old
Belcher, himself.
Even so, certain
lessons leap out from the few known facts.
First, their
“live-in” domestic status was doubtless contributory. Javon’s mother had “visited”
from New York to assist in carrying for their 3-month old daughter, now cruelly
orphaned.
Marriage
with its expectations, conventions, duties and reciprocal obligations, beats
live-in hands-down! That is lesson #1 as we move through this tragedy’s sad deconstruction.
Second, the
baby, while blessed by God with birth, is now cursed by man in life with
orphanage. Bottom line: defer child-bearing ladies, until he has “put a ring on
it” as Beyonce sings famously! That protects the baby and you, precluding
questions pertinent to paternity etc. So, lesson #2 is don’t have a baby until
after you’re married “with papers” i.e., legally, under law.
Thirdly, the KC Star newspaper article linked above
reports that Kassandra Perkins had gone out to a concert, and afterwards had
gone for drinks with her friends, arriving home “late,” in Belcher’s estimation.
He, himself, had reportedly gone partying downtown and was later found by
police asleep in his car on a mid-town street, Armour Blvd.
The point
made here is that separate social agendas strain and imperil relationships to
the breaking point, especially live-in
relationships! So, lesson #3 whether married or not: if you are living in, at
least do things together as a couple, to thwart distrust or insincerity from
arising.
There may be
points others could add to this list. Many couples across America are “living-in”
under circumstances not too dissimilar from Belcher’s and Perkins’. Ideally,
they, too, will draw instruction from this all-too-hasty deconstruction and
amend their lives together, accordingly.
#30
